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2024 | Buch

Re-writing your Leadership Code

How your Childhood Made You the Leader You Are, and What You Can Do About It

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Über dieses Buch

Where do your instincts come from and how can you improve them?

Stretched by heavy workloads and facing ever more complex environments, leaders increasingly find themselves running on automatic and relying on their instincts. But depending on instincts is a bit like gambling, and as a result, stress levels, mistakes and failure rates are all on the up.

In this ground-breaking book, leadership experts Nik Kinley and Shlomo Ben-Hur reveal how our instincts are the products of childhood experience - lessons learnt that have become written into the structure of our brains. Like the source code at the centre of a computer, they underpin almost every aspect of our functioning as leaders. They affect how we interpret and experience things, how we react to events, the environments we choose, the impact we have on people, and even the responses we trigger in others.

Often these instincts and tendencies are hidden beneath professional poise. But under pressure, when we are deprived of time, they come to the fore. This is why leading under pressure can bring out the best and the worst in us. And it is why – ultimately – leadership is a test of the character of our instinctual code.

Based on decades of research, this book shows how we get to be the leaders we are today. It explains the tendencies and inclinations that past experiences can leave us with and the hidden ways in which they can affect who we are as leaders and how we behave. And crucially, it shows how we can make better use of our instincts and even improve them to become better leaders.

Inhaltsverzeichnis

Frontmatter

Looking Behind the Mirror

Frontmatter
Chapter 1. The Blind Gambler
Abstract
Presenting evidence that leaders are increasingly operating under pressure without time to fully think things through, this introductory chapter shows how leaders are more and more having to rely on their instincts. Using the analogy of a blind gambler, the chapter explores the risks inherent in this reliance, and the consequent need to understand where our leadership instincts come from in order to better manage them.
Nik Kinley, Shlomo Ben-Hur
Chapter 2. The Code
Abstract
Drawing on developmental neuroscience, this chapter explores the neurological mechanisms through which our leadership instincts become written into us like source code. It explains why our early childhood experiences tend to be the most influential in the formation of these instincts. And it explores how this code can affect how we interpret and experience things, how we respond to things, the environments we choose, the impact we have on others, and even how others behave towards us.
Nik Kinley, Shlomo Ben-Hur

Seeing Things for What they Really are

Frontmatter
Chapter 3. Interlude I
Abstract
Brief transcript of coaching session.
Nik Kinley, Shlomo Ben-Hur
Chapter 4. What We See. and What We Don’t
Abstract
This chapter explores how our early experiences can lead us to develop attention sensitivities, that can subsequently fundamentally affect our ability to function effectively as leaders. It explores how attention is an active process rather than a passive one. And it explains how our attention sensitivities can affect who we consult with and listen to, the options we tend to prefer, the standards we judge people by and our sensitivity to risk and reward.
Nik Kinley, Shlomo Ben-Hur
Chapter 5. Balancing the Attention Seesaw
Abstract
This chapter explores how we can better manage the attention sensitivities encoded within us by our earliest experiences. It provides guidance on how to identify how your attention sensitivities affect who you consult with and listen to, the options you tend to prefer, the standards you judge people by and your sensitivity to risk and reward. And it shows how you can then manage the impact of these sensitivities through better balancing them.
Nik Kinley, Shlomo Ben-Hur

Maintaining your Composure

Frontmatter
Chapter 6. Interlude II
Abstract
Brief transcript of coaching session.
Nik Kinley, Shlomo Ben-Hur
Chapter 7. Deep Currents Moving
Abstract
This chapter introduces the idea that three deep-lying encoded tendencies affect our emotionality and thus how we emotionally respond to events at work. It explains how our emotionality can influence our effectiveness as leaders. And it introduces the first of the three encoded tendencies—general reactivity—exploring the childhood experiences that can affect how it develops, how it then affects us in later life as leaders, and how we can identify it within us.
Nik Kinley, Shlomo Ben-Hur
Chapter 8. Your Emotional Targeting System
Abstract
This chapter introduces the second of the three encoded tendencies that can affect our underlying emotional reactivity: Our biological anxiety response. It explores the neurology underlying this response, the childhood experiences that affect how it develops, and how it can affect us as leaders in later life, particularly when operating under pressure.
Nik Kinley, Shlomo Ben-Hur
Chapter 9. How You Feel About Yourself
Abstract
This chapter introduces the final of the three encoded tendencies that can affect our underlying emotional reactivity: Implicit self-esteem. It explores the differences between implicit and explicit self-esteem, the childhood experiences that affect how it develops, and how it can then affect us as leaders in later life, particularly when operating under pressure.
Nik Kinley, Shlomo Ben-Hur
Chapter 10. Interlude III
Abstract
Brief transcript of coaching session.
Nik Kinley, Shlomo Ben-Hur
Chapter 11. The Regulator Within
Abstract
This chapter explores how our early childhood experiences influence our ability as adults to regulate our emotions and thereby function effectively as leaders. Distinguishing between internalisers and externalisers, it explains the underlying neurology of self-regulation. It provides guidance on how to identify our own level of self-regulation. And it explores how self-regulation can be developed through four methods: Modification, suppression, interruption and control.
Nik Kinley, Shlomo Ben-Hur

Dealing with People

Frontmatter
Chapter 12. Interlude IV
Abstract
Brief transcript of coaching session.
Nik Kinley, Shlomo Ben-Hur
Chapter 13. The Relationships We Have
Abstract
This chapter explores how early childhood experiences affect the development of our social core: A group of underlying social tendencies that remain with us through our adult lives. It explains how this social core can affect our relationships at work and our functioning as leaders. And it introduces the four foundations of this social core: Sociability, positivity, empathy and adaptability.
Nik Kinley, Shlomo Ben-Hur
Chapter 14. Transferred Intuitions. Scripted Routines
Abstract
This chapter explores how our early childhood experiences can affect the development of our social intuition and routines. First, it explains what social intuition is, how it forms and how it can affect us as leaders. It then introduces the idea of transference and explains how transferred intuition can affect our approach to relationships. Next, it delves into social routines, explaining how they can form, how they can affect us and how they are sometimes best thought of as scripts.
Nik Kinley, Shlomo Ben-Hur
Chapter 15. Approaches to Authority
Abstract
This chapter explores how early childhood experiences can affect our approach and attitudes towards authority in later life. It explores in particular how anxiety about authority and distrust towards it can form. And it explains how these encoded tendencies within us affect what we trigger in others and how we manage our teams and stakeholders.
Nik Kinley, Shlomo Ben-Hur
Chapter 16. The Tensions We Create
Abstract
This chapter explores how early childhood experiences can affect how we spot and interpret tension and conflict in the workplace, and how we then react to it. It then explores how these underlying tendencies encoded within us can also influence our impact upon other people, and thereby the responses we trigger within them.
Nik Kinley, Shlomo Ben-Hur
Chapter 17. The Solutions You Can Use
Abstract
This chapter provides detailed guidance on how you can better manage your underlying encoded social intuition and tendencies through interrupting transference processes and rewriting social script routines.
Nik Kinley, Shlomo Ben-Hur

The Character of Your Code

Frontmatter
Chapter 18. Shaping Your Impact
Abstract
This final chapter explores how the character of our underlying encoded sensitivities and tendencies can fundamentally affect our effectiveness as leaders. It describes the prevailing ‘cult of capability’ that seems to determine how we currently select and elect leaders—a focus on what they do for us. And it advocates instead for a greater consideration of leaders’ character and the effects this can have upon us. Finally, it describes seven lessons for leaders on how to better manage these instincts. And it explains four consequences of this research for how organisations can best select and develop leaders.
Nik Kinley, Shlomo Ben-Hur
Metadaten
Titel
Re-writing your Leadership Code
verfasst von
Nik Kinley
Shlomo Ben-Hur
Copyright-Jahr
2024
Electronic ISBN
978-3-031-52395-3
Print ISBN
978-3-031-52394-6
DOI
https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-52395-3

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